the average lifespan of a fly

this morning, while i waited at a red light,
a fly waited with me
crawling up and down my window
making love to the glass
did she want out? I wondered
I tried to help by rolling it down
but she wouldn't leave
I drove faster when the light went green
and still she clung on

flies have eyes on top of their heads
so it's unlikely she enjoyed the view
of hills and trees as I drove past
more probably she was looking at me
trying to gauge if I
was as terrible as my size
if I were any more dangerous
than the cars outside
windshields flying with crushing speed
or all the chills and spiders and birds
that awaited her out there
to spell out the end of her week-long life

some flies only live a day
perhaps she was spending her only morning
with me
and all I wanted was to rid myself
of the disgusting miniature beast
who held me hostage here

and it wasn't until I slammed the brakes
before the thing that rushed up in front of me
ballooning in vermillion color
to emerge as a car, that I
felt pity for my passenger
hiding in here from a fearsome, titan world
where it only takes a second
for an SUV to become a red giant star
explode into size and obliterate you

and still when she beat her wings
all I felt was spite and fear
out there is a scary place
but it's worse in here

I wonder if I'll see her again
maybe eating garbage, or begging for crumbs

she was the downtrodden, windswept
storm-beaten, terrified creature of this world
who for no explicable reason holds onto life
just when the rest of us would roll down the glass
to force her out
thinking that she must want what we want
and after all, we just want out

Copyright © 2010 AnnMarie Hurtado